Year in Review, Michael Zarick - 2024

Introduction

This will be the second year that I've written this, and I think it will ultimately be better than the first. Ideally, if I write another, it will be better again, and so on.

This brings me to the theme of this Year in Review (YiR?) - Growth.

That is the human condition: to look back upon your experiences and become more than you were before. To deepen your understanding of the world around you and the things you believe. To build something, frankly anything. To cultivate community, work towards being better, and ultimately live life.

This seems so obvious. I've known it before and forgotten it, only to relearn it multiple times over. It is something I fear I may forget again, and even worse, I am concerned some others may never learn the first time. It's just the way of things. But anyway, let's talk about me.

Also, rather than have a massive section dedicated to video games as I did this previous year. I've written a separate piece for that. You can check that out by clicking here.

None of this was written with AI. Thanks for reading my words.

2024 Goals Recap

I was initially concerned that I had failed in the goals I had set for this year. A lingering effect of a Michael from earlier in the year. This feeling was immediately quashed upon re-reading the list.

• Sell at least one piece of pottery I made this year
• Get healthier, focus on home-cooked food, and go to the gym a bit more
• Learn at least one song on the banjo (hoping for it to grab me even more)
• Dress better, find my personal fashion sense, and gain back some confidence through that
• Meet my nephew and visit the people who matter.
• Take a real vacation, no obligations!

Successes

The series of goals seems simple on review. I think that's ok because the feeling of dopamine received from simply achieving or partially achieving these, I think, made it worth it.

This past year, I have eaten better, started cooking more, and eaten out less (mostly out of a desire to save some cash). Beyond this, I've recently joined my local YMCA and am determined to return to the fitness I once had. I've also taken up basketball but don't yet have the confidence to play pickup at the Y. I do have a desire to become "the old guy" everyone knows who plays basketball at the gym, though.

I have a very long-winded belief about fashion in the US and why it has, in my opinion, deteriorated so heavily. It has to do with cars. Ask me about it sometime. Because of this, I was determined to dress better. I feel like I succeeded. Objectively, I left the house more after thinking about my outfit and spent more on clothing; subjectively, I felt like I did well. Anna willingly takes photos with me. I think that's the real win 😂.

I also had the great honor of meeting Leo Andrew Zarick, my nephew. I think he could be a GAP model if his baby agent was better. Interwoven through hanging out with Leo, I also made time to relax away from work, a pastime that seems harder to come by all the time. And I have been blessed once again with another family member by the name of Nour. Looking forward to meeting them in the coming year.

Shortfalls, yet triumphs

Candidly, I did not sell any pottery this year. There is a lot to be said about the accessibility of pottery. It's relatively expensive, time-consuming, and ultimately pretty difficult. That is not to say that my craft fell by the wayside. Quite the opposite, in fact. I made a number of great friends and got to watch others to learn their techniques and ideas. But since money is tight, time is limited, and I've moved cities, I'm basically on reset. Looking forward to continuing to improve further in a new place with new people. See some of the things I made below.

On the topic of the banjo. I didn't even open the case. But it stares at me longingly, and I stare back, so the time to make music will come.

The Sweeter Things

Mawwiage

I got married this year on June 9th to Mrs. Anna Darling. We didn't change our names. They are both just so iconic. Our wedding day was perfect in weather and in display. I looked good, and Anna looked radiant, which is consistent with experience. When the problems of the world seem so large, a small gathering with an outsized display of affection can act as a reminder of what is truly important. It is the people you surround yourself with and what you choose to do with your time with them that truly means the most.

I think a year ago, if you asked me if I thought marriage would change me in some way, I would have said no. The expectation was that if it was good before, it would be good still. I definitely felt as much the day after my wedding - things felt the same, like the day after your birthday. But as time has gone forward, an inexplicable softness has entered our relationship. The formality and commitment of the thing has made it more real. Like some god-spoken decree, things are better now than ever before and seem to be getting better. How does that work?

Oh, and for the record, I also proposed in February. That was fulfilling in its own way. It took a lot of coordination and some help (thanks, Steph), but I fooled her entirely. I have the video if you want to see it. I'm looking forward to what the future brings to our relationship. It gets better every day.

My brother, Daniel, got married as well. We haven't had time to chat about what that feels like. But I enjoyed the amount of familial love I was able to experience in the past year. Now more than ever before, it feels important to have a sense of family and community to keep yourself held together.

Movement and Motion

Like a lost puppy, a plastic bag, or a nomad of a bygone era, I go where the wind takes me. In this case, the wind is Anna, and I was taken to Indianapolis by way of a stark winter gust. It felt like it happened in a flash. Thank goodness we had so much help. Not everyone is so lucky.

While living in Arkansas was a joy, living where I do now in Indianapolis has been just short of euphoric and we're just starting off. I think it's difficult to state exactly why. I think a change of pace is the best thing someone can do for themselves, but I also am extremely grateful for where I have landed.

• I am nearer to family. Minus 7 hours does a lot
• I am in a more diverse place both physically and of thought (though the geographical diversity of flat could use some work)
• My neighborhood is walkable, safe, and active
• Our cat loves watching the birds and squirrels out the window. A gift not given to her for a long time
• Anna's job seems kinder to her in many ways
• My access to places through the larger airport and by driving feels more consistent
• The culinary variety and quality is exciting
• The opportunity for community involvement abound
• and more...

Tonal Shift

Suddenly, everything looked different. Windswept hills weren't just dusty and brown, they were home, welcoming [him] back after his long, exhausting trials. A blue sky that had watched him dance wanted to see joy once more.
Life wasn't a thing of beauty for him, and the shadows hadn't vanished, but someone had found a way out. The road was no longer a path toward doom or death. It was a way forward.
Strange, how much could change because of a conversation.
-Brandon Sanderson (Wind and Truth)

I often say that the worst thing I ever did for my mental health was to become aware of the world. To pay attention to the news, to the choices made in history, and to active decisions made now to bring harm to others. It's a terrible thing to be aware of. Ignorance truly is bliss in so many ways.

This year, I am still aware of these things, and I plan to always be, but I have changed my mental framework. I've gone from doomscrolling to relentless positivity: an emotion echoing a younger me.

How did this occur? I moved cities and watched some Youtube. No, really. These are the videos.

• You Will Be Okay. You Have No Choice.
• We Are In A "FOURTH TURNING," What Does That Mean?

These two videos are landmark for me, hitting essentially right when I moved, at a time when my brain was malleable and accepting of new ideas. I've rewatched them both a couple of times when I share with others, and I still understand. Both of these videos center around a look back to times in the past when things looked bad and then, without fail, always become good again. Something that is inconceivable to us at any given moment but is of historical fact. This reframing of my existence appealed perfectly to what I needed, seeking an explanation of many things. As a result, I have not only returned to a state of mental normalcy but also excited for what the future holds because I know it will eventually be great, if not for me specifically, for someone else.

Yearning for Creativity

I think all people have a desire to create. Interwoven throughout the year, it was no different for me. First, I had my goals which we've discussed. But I decided I wanted to build upon what I already know - video games. I wanted to highlight the games I played each week to share my experiences and hopefully build credibility and a following in the space. I've only just begun.

It began here with Ghost, the blogging site. I published a weekly roundup of games or gaming news every week through early April. I enjoyed it for a time, but it never felt perfect. It needed refining, and I desired to do more with well-thought-out content, not the low effort of just getting things on the page. However, nothing is low effort when you're out of practice.

Later in the year, I began making videos on my Youtube channel. I published between 2-3 a week for a good amount of time, in addition to pulling shorts from the videos to try and drive extra viewership to the main videos. It was an interesting learning experience. I got single-digit views to start and got over 1100 on my highest. An accomplishment I am proud of.

What I truly want is something in between these two ideas. I'm looking forward to refining it further. A special thank you to Skillup on Youtube, who I have yet to speak to, for constant inspiration in this.

"It's a Rebuilding Year"

And like the Indiana Hoosiers, my season has come to a close. I've got the momentum, the coach at the helm, and likely a great incoming freshman class. It's time to take that foundation and mold it into a lasting household name. No, I'm not a sports guy. But, now more than ever, I love the energy and community that springs forth from sports. A final bastion of the third space Americans so need.

One of the best things said to me this year was effectively this. "Sometimes a target is just something to aim for. It doesn't matter if you hit it or not."

This brings me to my goals for 2025, I look forward to sharing the outcome:

• To read and, through reading, be able to voice my beliefs more clearly
• To set a course for life and to reorient the sails to head in that direction
• To continue to develop myself and deepen my appreciation for those around me
• Meet my niece!
• To join or create a community locally and grow it
• To join or create a community (not locally) and grow it
• To record future 2025 goals somewhere so I can feel good about them later